Modern Reality TV - All About Sex?

The 21st century has seen a huge increase in reality-style TV shows. Building from the competition-based Big Brother, American Idol and Popstars clones, more and more shows are beginning to move away from the competitive nature, and focus more on real-life situations, where drama does not need to be manufactured and forced through a group of people living in restricted space (because let's face it, drama is arguably the key audience winner for most of these shows). The main network to push out these new shows is without a doubt MTV, and for some time had a near-monopoly on the concept. Shows such as My Super Sweet 16 and Exiled are front-runners in setting the benchmark, however it was soon realised that a diverse range of shows was needed in order to fully capture the reality feel. The creation of the infamous Jackass franchise (and other related shows such as Viva la Bam and The Dudesons) is one example of this, as well as Ashton Kutcher's Punk'd, and the often laughable Pimp My Ride. What really seemed to provide everything an audience wanted, however, was Jersey Shore.

Jersey Shore copped a lot of flak for various reasons on its debut. Multiple Italian-American organisations felt that the show was bordering on racist, and the Governor of New Jersey expressed annoyance at the negativity thrown on New Jersey by the show, despite the fact that none of the cast members were from New Jersey. Needless to say, the show's popularity is undeniable, with multiple American spin-offs being produced, as well as Canadian and British versions. Whilst the first season only averaged 2.7 million viewers (keep in mind that 4.8 million watched the season finale), the second season averaged a stunning 5.252 million, and the third season premiere hit just under 8.5 million viewers - making it MTV's most viewed telecast of all time. That is until the second and fourth episodes were aired, garnering 8.57 and 8.87 million viewers respectively.

But what is it about Jersey Shore that makes it so appealing? Yes, it is rife with the drama that brings out the schadenfreude in all of us, but surely that can't be the only factor. It's openness towards sex, nightlife and general party aspects are undoubtedly as enticing as the constant disagreements, arguments and outright conflict.

And it's those last factors that really need to be looked at closely. In particular, sex. Today's society is far more open about sex and sexuality than it has been in decades. It's interesting to note that this openness is almost cyclic; by all accounts the ancient world was more open than today's, as well as the Renaissance world; however today the subject is far more acceptable than it was a hundred years ago. And TV programs are following this. Programs in the '70s - the age of 'free love' - were heavily censored, and it was not really until the late '00s that nudity and blatant sexual activity became acceptable to air - prime examples of this would be Rome, The Tudors, and Spartacus, just to name a few. While these are examples of fictional shows, the same has begun to happen in the reality world. My Super Sweet 16 has now become 16 and Pregnant and Teen Mom. Sex is even spilling into competitive shows, with The Bachelor and The Bachelorette being replaced by shows such as A Shot at Love with Tila Tequila. Whilst drama is again a key factor of these shows, I'm unwilling to suggest they'd be as successful without the blatant sexual overtones - and in some cases, sex acts.

A more recent show that has just finished airing is the product of the UK's Channel 4. Titled The Joy of Teen Sex, it is a semi-documentary, filmed in similar a format to 16 and Pregnant. The show aims to answer various questions that British teens may have regarding sex and their bodies, particularly focusing on questions that are likely to cause embarrassment. Through the use of real-life stories, a team of actors demonstrating sex acts, and investigative journalism (there is a teenage journalist with her own section), the show aims to provide as much information as possible. In some cases, quite graphic information.

Don't get me wrong, I'm not a prude. But there is a huge difference between suggestive silhouettes and full frontal nudity. And I'm still fine with full frontal. When it gets to the point of watching a bloke receive a Prince Albert piercing, or an in-depth examination of a girl's STI-ridden genitals (or picture thereof), I do have a little bit of a problem coping.

I suppose the question I'm asking is, how much information is too much information? Are we so desensitized that we need fully confrontational material in order to get the message home? Or do we just enjoy being confronted, or shocked?

More than anything, will we ever have a chance of breaking free of the grip of schadenfreude, or are we doomed to forever find the greatest joy in the distress of others?

Treason, Espionage, and Other Fun Words

One of the major international news stories at the moment is the ongoing prosecution of WikiLeaks' mastermind and founder, Julian Assange. There is a considerable amount of flak flying from both sides, with governments worldwide condemning the man, and a huge public following showing support.

What's interesting, is that in a lot of countries out for his blood, he may actually not have committed any crime.

The Australian Federal Police concluded an investigation into Assange's actions by advising the Government that there had been no breaches of Australian law. This of course comes after PM Julia Gillard's scathing comments about Assange, including an assertion that his actions were entirely illegal. This faux pas seems to have cost Labor a significant amount of public support - although that is neither here nor there in terms of the issue at hand. WikiLeaks has been publishing classified documents that it argues will allow the global public to better educate themselves in terms of government policy. The question that needs to be asked is whether the documents released are actually effective in doing this. In some cases, definitely, such as the proposed Australian web blacklist. However, Bill McGowan raises a very good point when he proposes that, "Naming names of diplomats who have issued candid assessments of sensitive foreign affairs and foreign leaders, under the expectation of confidentiality, will destroy or diminish the trust and credibility of our [United States] envoys, and work against candid communication and sound policymaking." McGowan goes on to suggest that continued releases of this nature by WikiLeaks would in fact produce less transparency - completely subverting its purpose.

Don't get me wrong, I'm all for freedom of speech and national transparency in every country, and respect that WikiLeaks has published many important documents that have contributed to this. One just needs to think about whether the opposite has also been achieved in some cases.

SA U20s in the Gold Coast

I thought I'd give a bit of a quick summary of the past weekend's activities.

We flew out of Adelaide at 6.15am, with only about 12 hours until our first match against the Currumbin Alleygators. After arriving in the Gold Coast we had a brief training session before eating lunch at Northcliffe Surf Club (our 'clubrooms' for the tour) and checking in to our hotel. We then departed for Currumbin, and our first showing of what the Gold Coast had to offer, and what the Junior Falcons could achieve on the paddock.

For the first game, Connor Smith was in the starting XV on the wing, whilst John Carver Jr and myself were on the bench. The game was a bit messy, something which can only be expected from a team that has never played together, but the structure which had been drilled into us in training came through, and as a result we were able to build some very aggressive rugby, in both attack and defence. As I recall, Currumbin managed to score first, but failed to convert. Instead of hanging their heads, the team struck back hard and despite a missed penalty attempt by Ashley Rio (Woodville) that fell short by less than a meter, maintained pressure for the rest of the half (which was only 30 minutes). The halftime score was 5 - 0 against us, however in the second half SA put the throttle to the floor right from the whistle, regaining their kicked ball, and quickly getting into the strike zone. Within minutes, prop Java Posala (Old Collegians) burst over the line in the right corner to level the score. The try was unconverted. Late in the second half, Carver Jr and myself were substituted on, and Smith off due to a shoulder injury. We maintained the aggression that had been prominent throughout the game, and quickly found ourselves back at the scoring end of the field, thanks mainly to a lack of discipline from the opposition, which later resulted in their captain being sent from the field for the rest of the game. After some sustained phase play, an excellent line from Matt Benger (Burnside) allowed him to cross the line between the sticks, and this was easily converted to bring the score to 12 - 5, the final score of the game.

After a day of recovery and light training in the Gold Coast heat, we arrived at Coomera to play the Coomera Crushers. We had been warned that there were plenty of islanders in the side, and the heat (the game kicked off at 12.30) was sure to play a factor. Carver Jr, Smith and myself were all starting, at 8, 14 and 6 respectively. I don't remember much of this game, probably because of the heat, however the standout moments were Connor's involvement in all three of our tries scored (setting up two and scoring one) as well as John's many line breaking runs up the field. The first try was scored off broken play, in a masterful action by Smith, where a kicked ball from SA was allowed to bounce. Smith, chasing, managed to get to the ball and kick it on the bounce into the opposing 22, where he regained it, and offloaded to center, Chris Bartlett (Old Collegians) who crossed the line near the sticks. Jack Macklin (Old Collegians) easily added the extras, and SA received the restart. At some point Jack added a penalty goal, before a bit of lax defence allowed Coomera to cross the line. The try was unconverted, and the score stood at 10 - 5. SA rallied, however, and hit back, phase play taking us to into striking distance with the forwards on the left of the field, at which point the ball was sent wide to Smith, whose trademark speed took him over the line in the right corner, however laziness by the Crushers allowed him to ground the ball only a few meters right of the posts. Macklin again added the extras and SA looked in top form with the score at 17 - 5. Coomera was not giving up easily, and in the last play of the first half launched an 8 pickup from SA's 5 meter line, and crossed the line. The conversion again failed, and the score at half time was 17 - 10. In the second half, the heat was really beginning to take its toll, as SA defence was beginning to lag, and no longer shutting down the space. Coomera managed to notch up another try, and things were looking a little bit grim at 17 - 15, however in the last ten minutes or so, Connor gave a pass to Macklin which allowed him to break the line and outrun the opposing 15 for a 50-meter try. He then added the points, and the score rested at 24 - 15.

All in all it was a very productive weekend in terms of getting the team a run together, with two solid wins. There were some difficulties that took some adjusting to, such as the heat, as well as "Gold Coast Rules", which allows the 8 to pick and go from uncontested scrums. Nonetheless, the overall performance was fantastic, and bodes well for the upcoming Southern States tournament, which i hope as many AURUFC players and supporters will make it to, to see a very skilled U20s side take on the best of what Victoria, Western Australia and Tasmania have to offer.

A Flawed Democracy

Right now it’s coming to the end of student elections at the University of Adelaide. And as always, it has been… interesting to say the least. Heavyweights Activate and IndyGo were challenged by a newcomer to the scene, Synergy. The international students put forwards a few strong candidates as always, and it has had all the hallmarks of a contestable student election.

That is, if enough students can be bothered going out to vote.

It saddens me a little to see that the vast majority of Adelaide’s thousands of students will spend more time working out how to avoid the polling booth than familiarizing themselves with policies, and voting. Particularly when you think about how all of them are required to vote in state and federal elections. If we have such a lack of interest in politics that directly affect us students, and only us, what are the chances we’ll show interest in far more broad-minded policies. I was a little annoyed (although, unsurprised) to see that the most recent issue of On Dit (Student Magazine) had an article devoted entirely to avoiding harassment from student politicians. Here’s my simple, one-step guide:

1. Make an informed vote.

It’s really that simple. Merely by voting, you can avoid harassment. Moreover, if you encourage your friends to vote, and keep up this voting trend throughout your time as a student, I can guarantee, ‘harassment’ will dwindle. All it takes is 5 – 10 minutes to actually see what the respective tickets have to offer, which doesn’t actually have to involve talking to the candidates, as almost every ticket has a Facebook page outlining their policies.

So, although there are only really 2 days left to vote, if you haven’t done so already, think about what I’ve said, and please act on it.

And if you really don’t want to vote, a simple smile with a “No thank you” should be enough to halt any politicians. There’s no need for all the other bollocks; it is, in a word, just plain rude.

Love, etc

~Coops

I Could Be Your Pornstar...

I'm not sure what it is about Amy Meredith, but whenever I listen to them (or indeed, Anberlin or In Fiction), I end up feeling really creative. As a result I decided to share with you the latest offspring of my creative blurb. See if you can guess its inspiration...

Inception

It first sneaks,
Sliding
Along dimly lit corridors.
Hiding from those
Who know it does not belong -
The stalwart guards
Of the mind.

But it is resilient,
And will seek root where it can.
Waiting
Growing
Evolving
Often beyond its creator's
Wildest imaginations.

Nothing
Is more dangerous
Or harder to kill
Than the only truly incurable virus
That is an idea.

Hopefully I'll be posting something a little more fulfilling soon (if my uni work allows it).

Adios.

The Classes of One-Night Stands

I thought I'd do something a bit rare and post a follow-up blog, continuing on the theme of one-night stands. Surprisingly enough, I have a collection of acquaintances who actively engage in one-night stands. Not being a veteran, I was a little curious as to some of the practices/rules/codes that govern how one acts before, during and after the event. After asking a few questions, I managed to put together a few categories, so you can classify yourself/your friend(s)/that person you woke up next to on Sunday morning.

The Empath: A confident individual who aims to make the other person feel comfortable and safe. Looks to make a connection. Relies on talking over good looks (although this doesn't mean they haven't got the goods).
- Usually one who will attempt conversation as part of their 'routine'
- Rarely off-their-face drunk when looking for a hookup, drugs unlikely
- Will buy you a drink
- Pays for the taxi (if needed) whether it's your place or theirs
- No/little expectations
- Up for pillow-talk after the event.
- Is still there in the morning (if it's your place)/Doesn't kick you out ASAP (if it's theirs)
- Offers breakfast/a shower/a ride home
- Might ask for your number (they will usually have sussed out the night before whether a) you're looking for something regular, and b) whether you're someone they would be interested in doing something regular with)
*NB: The Empath is one who, despite being the perfect gentleman/lady, is more often than any of the others to develop attachment, so be wary. Whilst you'll be looked after for the night, it might be hard to get rid of them down the track.

The Cruiser: This person is easily identifiable by their easy-going nature. They don't really care (at least, they don't show that they do) whether you leave with them or not, they're just happy to have a good night out.
- Mellow personality
- Can be at any level of drunkenness (but usually has a few under their belt), drugs are a possibility
- Might buy you a drink
- Will at least go halves on the cab, if it's to their place will probably pay the whole thing
- Expectations are there, although they are probably not too fussed if you don't live up to them
- Might go into some pillow-talk, but don't expect anything too deep. Unless it's philosophical.
- Will probably be there in the morning, although it could just be because they're coming down from something.
- Will talk to you until it becomes apparent you're no longer welcome
- Probably won't get your number
*NB: The Cruiser is the modern-day stoner, someone who isn't looking for any roots (pardon the pun), and is quite happy just floating with no commitment.

The Post-Empath: This individual is very similar to the Empath, with a few slight differences; the most important one being distinct emotional unavailability, although this is usually hidden.
- Usually one who will attempt conversation as part of their 'routine'
- Alcohol is part of their night out. How much depends on the night
- Might buy you a drink
- Might chip in for the taxi (if needed) whether it's your place or theirs
- No/little expectations
- Possibly up for pillow-talk after the event.
- Is still there in the morning (if it's your place)/Doesn't kick you out ASAP (if it's theirs)
- No morning awkwardness
- Might ask for your number
*NB: The Post-Empath is one who, despite being the perfect gentleman/lady, is decidedly uninterested in anything more than a release, not from being a player, just not being in the mindset for anything more. Don't expect anything deeper, but at the same time don't anticipate a cold shoulder either.

The D@$#&! : The naming for this individual does not so much describe the person's personality, but more the words you might use when describing them to your friends. This category does cover a large variety of people.
- Might attempt conversation, might go straight for the kill
- Will probably bit drunk, perhaps pinging too
- Not interested in getting you a drink unless they think it's worth it
- Expectations
- Expect them to either leave or fall asleep
- Don't expect them to be their in the morning. Or expect an awkward morning.
- Maybe they'll ask for your number
*NB: The D@$#&! is your stereotypical 'player', someone looking for a quick night of fun and not a lot else (although maybe a follow-up booty call... If you're worth it)

So there you have it, a few categories of one-night standers. But remember: no matter who you're going with, have fun, practice safe sex, and look on the bright side: none of the above is a blanket rule.

The One-Night Stand (And Other Stories of Convenience)

I hope no-one will hold it against me me if I blatantly state that today's society is one of convenience: fast food, fast transport, 'time-saving' devices, phones that let you access your e-mail, the newspaper, read books, or even just order a pizza. We are becoming gluttons of convenience (at least in the Western world), unwillingly to wait more than five minutes in a line or for public transport (unless you're in Adelaide, in which case, hope the bus shows up). However, it seems that even in our most intimate of places - the bedroom - convenience is rearing its deceptively stylish head, in the form of One-Night Stands.

The quote that is currently echoing through my head is from Fight Club:
Single-serving sugar, single-serving cream, single pat of butter. The microwave Cordon Bleu hobby kit. Shampoo-conditioner combos, sample-packaged mouthwash, tiny bars of soap. The people I meet on each flight? They're single-serving friends.

What is most important is the 'single-serving friends'. How many people do you know like this? People you start a friendship with, for a day, a week, an hour? I've sat on a plane and talked to someone, and will almost definitely never see them again. Of course, with the growing masses of Facebook, Twitter and (lesser it seems) MySpace, it has become a lot easier to maintain that 'connection' - again, another device of convenience. What is growing more and more prolific, however, is the One-Night Stand. It seems that despite all these time-saving and convenient devices, people are as short of time as ever, so short, in fact, that relationships are unappealing, and instead and physical comfort needed should be garnered from a one-off fling with a total stranger. Now I'm all for sexual exploration, but for something like this to become commonplace just heralds the death of emotional relationships. Maybe it is just the way things are, and with divorce rates worldwide steadily increasing, perhaps it is better not to even put oneself in that situation? The adage, 'It is better to have loved and lost, than never to have loved at all' comes to mind here.

Now don't get me wrong; I'm not against ONS, I think in most cases (and indeed, for some people) they can be very healthy, but I do not think they should become a lifestyle. It could be the prude in me (of which there is very little, so when it does speak up I usually take notice), but I fail to see the reward in constantly going to a random house for a more often than not drunken hookup, then slinking off in the morning, sometimes with a phone number, sometimes with nothing more than a name. Note the use of the word 'constantly'.

But as I said, it could just be me. I do, after all, enjoy cuddles a lot.

Big Time Boy Seeking Small Time Bands

I make it no secret that I love music in almost all shapes and forms. Skimming through my iTunes you will find genres from Classical to Death Metal to Indie to Rap and all the things in between. You will also find that a lot of the music I listen to is not hugely mainstream (although of course I enjoy some of it as much as any other teenybopper), and that I am a big fan of the so-called 'local' bands who hang around for a few years, pop out a gem and disappear when they realise that despite making excellent music, there is simply not spot in the music industry for them to carve out a living. Too many bands are forced to accept this reality - and let's face it, sooner or later a hobby involving travelling across the country, or as some small bands are lucky enough to do, across the world, on a regular basis just doesn't fit in to the job/family life that is required to actually make a living.

So this time I will be focusing on a few small-time bands that have unfortunately capitulated due to a variety of reasons, whether it be real life calling, internal problems, or just the realisation that it's "that time".


Spitalfield (Chicago, US) 1998 - 2007

Most people outside the US probably wouldn't have heard of this band unless they by chance saw them at an Australian gig (they did do a couple of tours, including Boys of Summer 2007), however I chose to start with a US band to make an important distinction between the 'local music' scene in Australia and in the US. Most small-time bands in Australia would not continue to play for 8 years without breaking into at least the Australian mainstream charts, whereas the music industry in the US is that much bigger (and indeed, their population creates an immensely diverse audience) that local bands can be around for a decade without ever striking gold, so to speak.

Spitalfield's distinct rock sound is really what set them apart from what most other bands had to offer. Despite being quite similar to the usual medium/light rock, they maintained a melodic sound throughout their time playing, and were able to comfortably switch between easier listening and hard sounds not only within albums, but songs as well. Mark Rose's ability as a lyricist is to be regarded highly, especially when combined with the fact that he can actually hit the notes needed to make the song work (he is now performing as a solo act - proof of both his vocal and guitar abilities). Despite moving through several guitarists in their 8 years, including a few who only played with the band for a single tour, they consistently produced melodic rock riffs that formed a stable background for Rose's lyrics. Spitalfield will continue to be sorely missed by its fan-base in both the US, and worldwide.


Her Latest Flame (Adelaide, AUSTRALIA) 2005 - 2008

Her Latest Flame is a band that fits the typical notion of local band more than Spitalfield - they formed for a few years, played a few gigs and then due to internal troubles fell apart (the original vocalist left). However, in their time they did enjoy playing several relatively high-profile gigs, including the 2006 Taste of Chaos, opening on the 'V' stage at Big Day Out 2007, and being a support act for the 2007 Saosin/A Static Lullaby Australian Tour. They released two EPs in their time, and enjoyed an Australia-wide fan base.

HLF enjoyed a more alternative sound, probably best described as a punk/rock band, although their original vocalist did incorporate screaming into the majority of their songs in some shape or form. Josh Dunning is in fact one of the few small-time vocalists who could easily transfer from screaming to singing on-stage, often several times in a single song. How his voice survived is anyone's guess! Needless to say, Josh was ably supported by both a gifted guitarist (Matt) and a talented off-beat drummer (Brodie) that resulted in slightly melodic songs that still retained the teeth needed to support the screaming vox. Unfortunately, Josh's exodus from the band produced a downward spiral, and they hung up their instruments last year.


In Fiction (Adelaide, AUSTRALIA) 2004 - 2009

In Fiction holds a much more personal note for me as I have been a long-time fan of the band since their formation in early 2004. They definitely made a big impact on the Australian music scene, with their first EP, The Four Letter Failure, reaching No. 72 in the ARIA charts, where it remained for 5 weeks. Their second EP, Ghost, debuted at No. 14 in the ARIA charts. The recognition garnered from their records was obvious, with the band performing in both the 2006 and 2007 Boomtown Showdown Tours, as well as the 2007 Vans Boys of Summer Tour, and the 2008 Adelaide Soundwave Festival. When I interviewed front man Brad Gilbertson shortly before the band's final show earlier this year, the one thing he said that stuck in my head was when I asked him what his best memory was:
'Probably how everything was when we first started, it was the type of thing that doesn't really pay much but is so fun to do, like Steve [ex-drummer] and I grew up listening to Bodyjar, then all of a sudden we were playing on tour with them...'

IF were not just confined to Australia, either. Ghost caught the attention of Japanese label Pyropit Records, and prompted them to release an album combining the two EPs and including two extra songs.

IF were, if anything, most recognised for their diverse style and ability to combine complex melodies with a hard rock sound, although they moved more into a melodic style as the band matured. Gilbertson's flawless vocals were only enhanced by guitarists Paul Heitmann and Josh Burgan, who were able to smoothly switch between lead and rhythm roles depending on the song. However, Tom Crosby and his predecessor Steve Luscombe were respective maestros on the drum kit, despite having fairly different styles (I will go ahead here and push Steve over Tom, merely because of Steve's amazing left-footed ability, and the fact he could switch smoothly from an upbeat song such as Here in a Way to slow, off-beat song, Calendar Notes. Unfortunately, after 5 years of music-making, the band members decided to set off in different directions, with one of them getting married, another aiming to (finally) finish his degree and the rest just planning on "growing up" a little bit and seeing where life takes them.


Well, that's all for now, and I would encourage all of you to go out and enjoy some local music. You never know what gem you may find.

Age-Old Adages

Ever noticed how many ye olde sayings are still around today? Maybe it's a bit of an overestimation of their age, but haven't you ever had a moment where some older relative pops out a little nugget of their years, you polish it up expectantly in your head... And then discover as opposed to being a gold nugget, it's more likely to be comprised of that strange ear wax only 60+ year olds get. So I thought that this week/month/year? (There's no real regularity to these posts) we'd tear asunder some of the sayings that should have been left in a retirement home many, many years ago.

1. "I don't try to explain to people why I ride a Motorcycle."
I thought I'd start off with something simple. Firstly... what the hell? I mean, if you started but they didn't understand, then it would make sense not to try and explain further... But not trying at all? If kids of today went out to do something, and when asked by their parents what/where/why/when, and replied with "I don't try to explain why I do x", we'd either have a lot of dead kids or a lot of grounded ones. Hey, in fact - go for it! Either way, let's keep them off the streets.

2. "Come home early, nothing good ever happens after midnight."
Don't they know that most clubs don't even get started until after midnight? What about midnight snacks? Midnight sex? Sex at 3am? Sex in general, pretty much. This is what you get when your ancestors lived in a sexually repressed society; although the current situation where it has completely back flipped (i.e. the full-on sexually open) could be a little bit too far. At the rate we're going, my kids (if they ever come into being) will be learning about contraception around the same time they're learning to walk.

3. "When you say "I can't", you actually mean "I don't want to"."
Try saying that to the double amputee you want to run the 100m sprint.

4. "Never own ANYTHING you aren't willing to drill a hole in."
Now, now, remember, men and women are equals now, men don't own their wives...anymore. I'm sorry, that was just too easy. But still, if anyone, including me brings a drill near the Aston-Martin DB9 I 'own' for the sake of the conversation, I'll get them where they stand.

5. "Your enemies can hurt you, but only your fear defeats you! Only those who risk going too far will ever know how far they can go."
And remember kids, those who risk going too far are 100% more likely to die screaming as their parachute fails to open/bungee cord snaps (or as it was found recently, comes undone)/F1 car spontaneously explodes... Although in their slightly shorter lifespans, they probably have more fun, earn more, get some plastic trophy wife (not sure whether that's a plus or a minus), sleep with adoring teen fans (ditto to this one - some of those girls are probably about as safe to plug as a chemical toilet)... So it could balance out.

6. "Anyone who hasn't got a little bit of a temper is not worth killing."
That's just discrimination against people with anger problems.

7. "A young man is embarrassed to question an older one."
The older man has obviously never met me. My parents decided I was the most argumentative child in existence. They still hold this view, I believe (although my brother is catching up and will most likely overtake me).

8. "Live life to the fullest."
This saying differs in that whilst I agree with what it's trying to say (try and make your life mean something) it's missing a key part (try and make your life mean something to someone). Who's to say that a CEO of a Fortune 500 company, who started off as a bottle-cap collector, has lived a fuller life than a garbage collector with 3 kids and a mortgaged house? Admittedly, the CEO probably has several houses, various vehicles and many more opportunities, but taking a different approach, the garbage collector who never wanted to move on because he was looking after his kids, or simply because he loved his job - and before you wrinkle your nose in disgust, there probably are people out there doing the shitty jobs no-one else wants to do, and they enjoy them. Not because they love handling tonnes of garbage, or scrubbing hundreds of toilets, but because the job gives them something that is important to them, whether it be more time with their family, a host of colleagues who become good mates... Etc, etc.

9. "Oh isn't so-and-so sweet on you! [Or] You're rather sweet on so-and-so, aren't you?"
Oh yeah, every time we hug I just want to lick her off me. Or scrape it off and put it in my coffee. Seriously, where did this even originate? Was it traditional for lovers to cover themselves in honey and rub over each other? Because that could be kinda hot, if a little sticky.

And finally, my personal favourite:

10. " Such-and-such is the best thing since sliced bread."
Just putting it out there: sliced bread isn't that great. I mean, yeah, you save an extra 30 seconds making a sandwich, and you don't need to have the requisite knife skills. Excellent. Personally I'm a fan of cutting the slices myself, you can go thin for thin sandwiches, thick for packed sandwiches or thick-cut toast, or my personal favourite (and specialty) the wedge, which is both thick and thin, and results in every subsequent slice also being a wedge as the next person tries to correct my mistake. Still, there's something so down-to-earth about doing it yourself, one man, his knife and a loaf of bread waiting to be cut...
...sounds like the type of movie that would be released fairly soon.

Adieu!

Little help?

Sooooo...

I have decided to build a new computer. I am in need of either funds or cheap/free parts!

These are the specs:

Intel Core i7 920
ASUS P6T Motherboard
g.skill DDR3 8GB Kit
Hitachi 1TB HDD
GeForce GTX 275
Antec 900-2 Case
Seasonic PSR 650+ PSU
SATA LG DVD Burner

So if there are any generous people out there who want to help me out, let me know?

Also I have ceased my studies of Law - after 2 years of deliberation I have decided I am not corporate bastardy enough. As such, next year hopefully I'll be studying Psychology.

Ciao!